Let yourself bloom - Diary 20

I read yesterday a great blog written by my friend Izzy and I started to think more on the subject. Yes, I could have written a long ass comment but I just limited myself to a small funny (or trying to be funny) one. I do tend to use humor when I find the subject a little complex. I don’t know how to do colorful links and sh** but here is a link to her article - http://www.megsmumbo.blogspot.com/. On the blog find -Ask Izzy and you are good to go bich**.

She keeps her identity there anonymous because that’s how she rolls.

The subject if I got it right is changing for your next relationship. I’m still in the same one after 22 years so I hope I don’t have to go through this. BUT, I can offer some observations as an avid Millionaire Matchmaker watcher. Yes, I said it. I watch that crap, so what? You gonna judge? (Good grammar there) Well, go right ahead, because most likely I’m judging you back. I’m aggressive today, must be the caffeine and lack of sugar. Makes me itchy or bitchy. Either or.

I believe that we can always learn from a past relationship. If our ears and nose are forever growing (according to my daughters bio book, or was it her health book, whatever), then we are forever changing. We should be changing all the time. I don’t want to be the easy no chapter book to be read. I want to have chapter, hidden stories, mystery, sex, some drama, to be continued…etc.

The Millionaire Matchmaker chick says no sex for three months when you enter a relationship (and my very good friend B agrees with her). Having sex early on makes the other person only think of you a sex object and not as someone they are connected with mentally. My opinion is that, if they are thinking of you in a sexual way, they are connected mentally with you, right? Ok, moving on. I believe in body chemistry, spark. This for me applies, especially if you are over 25. If you meet someone and they just make you alive all over, you should totally jump their bones. Do you think cavemen waited three months? No, if their dirty ass penis rose up, they went for it. Are you always YOU when you meet someone new? I think we all have an act we follow. We are at our best behavior, groomed to the hilt, checking out teeth 5 times after we eat, and smiling at jokes we would ordinarily bleh.

People say, stay true to yourself. Do any of us know who we really are? I see so much confusion in people. We are all always looking for an answer, and who you are for sure today may change tomorrow if something tragic happens. We are evolving, moving, confused, amazed, angered or sad. I am not the same person my husband married. I am not the same person I was two years ago. My values have not shifted, my love has grown, my commitment is solid still, but I’m not the same person. Relationships are never going to be 50/50 and you are fool if you think they are. Someone is always giving more and it changes with our day to day.

Be true to love, not yourself. Be friends first, that’s always better. Be seduced and seduce. Take a million chances if you failed 999,999 of them. Be open always, and even if you get hurt, get up and try again. As I type this I’m changing, I’m evolving. I’m realizing that I have closed myself to friends and people around me. Going to think of myself as a flower that is opening up towards the sun and will let soul be filled with sunshine and love. Don’t try to be a bee and come all up in my business will ya? Pervs.


Peace and love